Sweet moment :)

I haven't really had much to say lately.....things are at a stand still I guess. Just lots of waiting.

A really sweet thing happened to me the other day though. I had the kids with me at the grocery store and while I was grabbing my items the cashier was entertaining them.

(As an aside note, we really haven't sat down with our kids and said 'for sure, we are adopting, and this is how and when....', so we really have no idea how they feel about the situation. We have been slowly introducing the idea of adoption to them though, so that it is a normal idea.)

So, to get back to my story the kids were in the cart at the store, and they were talking to the cashier who was a nice middle aged woman. The woman said to them,

"My, your mom has her hands full with you guys doesn't she?!"

and Ryan said to her

"YEAH. But not full enough because we are getting another one! But not through the tummy, through adoption."

then Jack chimes in:

"Yeah and she's not gonna be white, she's gonna be BLACK, but that's okay"

!

Ha! I guess my kids have a general idea of what is going on after all!!

What is sweet about it all is how proud they were. They were talking about it as if it was the best thing that was ever going to happen to them. They were proud to say they were going to be big brothers again! I almost got a little teary eyed listening to the conversation. The poor cashier didn't know what to say. She just giggled nervously as I paid. Funny!

Pray!

Hi Friends!

There has been some new developments in our adoption journey!! Because of the nature of the situation we are in, we can't really elaborate at all, other than to ask you all to PLEASE PRAY for us! I promise that when we can, we will fill you in on what is going on here, but for now what we really need is lots and lots of prayer.

Over the last few weeks, and in particular the last few days Derek and I have seen God leading us in dramatic ways. It is amazing how when you ask, He answers.....and not always in the way you expect. In fact, sometimes He answers in a way that is better than you could ever imagine!!!

Telling our other children

When we first came to the realization that adoption was the way we would be going, we didn't really tell our children. Our oldest is 6 and our youngest is 2, we thought a wait of 2 or more years would be a long time for little munchkins to understand. But we did slowly start to introduce the idea to them. At supper we always have devotions and prayer with our kids and so one day we suggested that we pray for the orphans in the world. Kaylie, who is 4 said "what's an orphan?". So we explained how there are many children in the world who have no mom's and dad's and that they are called orphans. "That's horrible!" she cried. "They should come and live here, we have lots of room for orphans"

Well, that was easy :)

Everyday we talk a bit more about that idea. One day Derek said to them "What if we did take one of those orphans to live here with us?" Ryan said, " That would be great!" Derek said "Well, what if the one we took home had different color skin then you....maybe a bit darker? Maybe even black?"

(Awkward Silence)

Ryan : "Well that is no big deal, when they move here they won't be in the sun as much, so their tan will go away and they will be more pink"

(oh boy....)

Jack: "Ummmmm. That wouldn't be good. It would be really wierd."

Yikes. I guess we have a bit of work to do. Actually, since then Jack has gotten used to that idea.

They have no time frame in their minds except for "one day, when our baby comes home...." and for now, that is good enough.

Why International?

Several people have asked us why we have chosen to adopt internationally, when there are so many children in the foster care system here in Canada. That is a fair and valid question. Val and I believe every child deserves to have a mother and father that will love them unconditionally and forever, and our prayers are with those parents who decide to adopt domestically. There are basically three ways you can adopt a child if you live in Ontario. First, through Family and Children Services, (FACS). Secondly, through a liscenced private domestic agency, and third, international. The first option, through FACS, was appealing because it is free. The problem we had was the wait time was extremely long. Just to get a homestudy done was a year and a half wait, and then several months to complete it and get approved. Adopted children, when they are young, some times have problems attaching to their new families, and feeling like they belong. We felt a large age gap in-between our youngest child and our new child would only complicate things, since our first four kids were all born within four years. Also, FACS often operates as a foster to adopt program, wherein a child would be placed in your home as a foster child while the adoption was finalized. If the adoption falls through, (a birth parent has a change of heart), and the child is returned, my family would be devastated. The risk of putting that stress on my children is one I can not take. The second option, private domestic also came with a considerably long wait time. The cost was very similar to some of the international agencies. There is a huge push amongst private agencies nowadays to have open adoptions, where birth parents still have contact with your child. This could be as little contact as writing letters back and forth or as much as seeing each other on the weekends. While experts claim these arrangements are the best for the child, I could not handle such an arrangement, for several reasons.(selfishness being one of them). These are some of the reasons why domestic adoption, which is a beautiful thing and God bless those that choose that route, just wasn't suitable for us.

Citizenship

When you adopt a baby/child from another country, you have to apply for Canadian Citizenship for that child. (For the most part anyway, some countries want you to get immigration first, but that is a whole other thing). Guyana requires you to get citizenship. It's a 2 step process. Step 1, we have to prove that we are Canadian citizens eligible to apply for citizenship on behalf of our child. So that seems easy enough right? Just show the Canadian government a copy of my Canadian passport issued by them after I already proved I was a Canadian citizen. HA! Not quite. First I had to fill out PART 1 Form, photocopy mine and Derek's birth certificates, driver's licence, passports, and marriage licence. (PS not the old marriage licence the new one issued by the government a few years ago and you have to apply for that one too which takes about a month or two to come in....thanks for the heads up about that Sue...having that ready was a real bonus!) So then, with my photocopies and original documents in hand I went to the lawyers office (lol, 4 kids in tow because I was anxious to send it out yesterday and they could only meet with me at lunch!) to get each copy notarized by a notary public, with a seal and letter with each one. Then all the documents go in the envelope along with a receipt that you paid already online or at a bank. (You didn't think this was going to be free did you?!?) Whew. Anyway, the whole Part one is now done. And that is really about all I got done yesterday. But now my citizenship Part 1 is on it's way to Nova Scotia!!! Only 27 weeks and I will get them back.....